It hurts, doesn't it? You were happy as could be when suddenly, wham! He's gone and left you brokenhearted. It feels like the end of the world, but it doesn't have to. Here are some tips that can help you not only get him back, but also make you feel a lot better.
Take a look at your behavior first. Are you bombarding him with text messages, emails, and phone calls every five minutes? Do you create a scene whenever or wherever you meet? If this is what you're doing, please stop right now. This behavior is completely counter productive, it can also become a nuisance and downright scary. It goes against human nature to respond positively to this type of harassment, and it is likely your ex will back off even further.
You need to be cool, and ignore him for a while. If you do happen to meet be casual and friendly. He'll start to wonder "Hey, what's going on here?" and having no need to be defensive, he'll relax. He will find you easy to talk to and so, to think of you and maybe remember good times you had together and why he fell in love with you in the first place.
It's also absolutely necessary for you to dedicate time to yourself. You must go out and have some fun. Obviously you will not want to start dating, but you need to see your girl friends, grab a bite to eat, catch a movie. Remember that your friends are your support network. As long as you don't overdo the "poor me" subject, and both show and feel interest in their lives as well, friends are a very necessary part of the healing process.
Start a new interest. Put your name down for that cooking class you always wanted to take, or do an art appreciation course, or whatever you like. Don't stay at home waiting for the phone to ring. Improve your social life and your skills. As you work on these challenges you will have little time and energy left for grieving over the break up. After a few weeks you will be amazed at the change in your life. That's the time to reassess your feelings for your ex. Do you still miss him enough to want him back? Or are you happy to carry on as you are?
If you do decide you still want him back, you must plan a strategy that avoids the mistakes you made before the break up. Go over your previous relationship with him carefully, trying to pinpoint what caused it to end, and what you need to avoid.
When you do meet he will no longer feel afraid of what you will do, so he´ll be friendly. Avoid making your feelings too obvious, and keep your distance. Try to be a little mysterious and a little hard to get to get him thinking about what he has lost, and let him make the first move.
Don't play games. Be honest about your feelings and don't play with him. This is a decidedly nasty and dangerous thing to do. It is always important to follow the golden rule of relationships: treat others as you would have them treat you.
I'm sure that after following these steps you will not be needing any more tips to get your ex boyfriend back.
Alejandra Pinero, English teacher living in Argentina. Have read and written on many topics, mostly related to life, relationships and cooking. http://www.writingmeanderings.blogspot.com
Source: Ezine