In any committed marital relationship, sex is a central component to its success!
When your sex life is intact and working at its best, everything will be stronger. The importance on this area is not to be discounted or overlooked. When the intimacy in your relationship is working at its best everything in your life will be better. Your relationships with your children, co-workers, and friends will be more meaningful. Let me quote from an email I received recently about getting into a rut when it comes to sex in marriage;
“If the amount of sex you’re used to having starts to slide, your body and brain can get used to the decreased intimacy, causing you to go even longer without wanting that closeness.”
You can see where this is detrimental for both sexes.
Women, if you want him to be more open sharing and caring to you, have more sex. Don’t wait till you are in the mood. Get in the mood. Act as if you are in the mood. I know you are tired! I know you’ve had to deal with ____ all day. Approach him for sex. Do not hold back such an important part of your relationship from him. Yes, I say this as a man and a husband. It’s that important. It is unwise and foolish to believe he will stay committed to you just because of a vow if you hold out on him. That is never an excuse for a man to cheat or turn to pornography. It is, however, very possibly a reason.
Men, give her a reason to want to come on to you. Bring the flowers home, for no reason other than you want to. Give her a night out on her own or with the friends. Make or bring home dinner and clean up afterward. Draw her nice bath. One of the biggest lessons I learned is that foreplay starts in the kitchen. The more time she doesn’t have to clean up after you and the kids, the more time and energy she has for you.
Let’s go to the clinical side of things for a moment. More and more scientific studies come out every year on the importance of a healthy sex life. Over the years studies have shown these emotional and physical benefits.
Researchers at Queens University have found that couples who have sex three times a week reap the benefits of it, including cutting the risk of heart attack and stroke in men by half. Women are always trying to get their husbands to eat better and exercise to improve their health, and that’s all fine, well and good. But no salad or morning jog can do all of the things that a healthy sex life can.
Another benefit is fewer colds and flu according to a Wilkes University in Pennsylvania study that says individuals who have sex once or twice a week show 30 percent higher levels of an antibody which is known to boost the immune system … Sex actually keeps you healthier!
Here are some more useful benefits:
Physical Health
Lower mortality rates. Reduces risk of prostate cancer. Actually improves posture and firms tummy and buttocks areas. Reduced risk of heart disease. Improves fitness level. Has a therapeutic effect on immune system. Better bladder control. Improved sense of smell. Relieves menstrual cramps. Helps people sleep better. Improves digestion. Lowers the level of cholesterol. Healthier teeth. Less-frequent colds and flu. Burns about 200 calories during thirty minutes of active sex.
Mental Health
Makes a person feel younger, offers pain-relief. Gives you a positive attitude on life. Makes a person more calm. Lowers feelings of insecurity. Boosts self esteem. Makes a person less irritable. Reduced depression. Helps folks remember more. Produces chemicals in the brain to stimulate the growth of new dendrites. Increases level of commitment. Keeps spouses connected emotionally.
So skip the gym and have sex together!
I often use the analogy of a hungry child. If a child came to you and said, “I’m hungry.” Would you just put him off by saying, “I’m not in the mood to feed you right now.” Of course not, you make them a sandwich out of their need to be fed, not because you felt like it or you were in the mood to do so.
I hope you noticed that I did not put a gender to my analogy. I did this because, even though the majority of the complaints of not enough sex in a relationship comes from the husband towards the wife, I have encountered a fair amount of women who have the same complaint towards their husbands.
The cynic might say something like, “Well, that’s different, if you don’t feed a child they might die. You won’t die from lack of sex.” To which I would argue; you might not die a physical death but you will eventually die an emotional death with will be the beginning of the end for your relationship. Also, as we just read the physical benefits of sexual relations, physical death is also a possible outcome.
So for the good of your relationship, your mental and physical health please, have more sex!