It is no secret that the divorce rate in the United States is high; not just for first marriages but for marriages the second and third time around. What is it that keeps people from having a successful marriage and breaking the divorce cycle?
There are several reasons marriages fail; many are destined to fail from day one. A major contributor to divorce is infidelity and divorcing because of unfaithfulness may lead to continued unfaithfulness and lack of trust in the future. The hurt and loneliness of divorce can drive people to enter new relationships before they are ready. Working through past hurts and self-improvement are both critical before starting a new relationship. When we take baggage from one relationship to the next all it does is poison the well and it is only a matter of time before the relationship takes a turn for the worse.
There is one person you need to really learn to understand and get to know and that is yourself. We all have our little issues that are going to follow us throughout life but it is the big ones that destroy our relationships that we need to address. It is important to take a good hard look at yourself and determine what needs to be fixed. Often times, it is simply learning to love yourself that can have a dramatic effect on the relationships in your life. People are drawn to one another based on their emotional health so the healthier you are the healthier the people will be in your life. If you have come from a completely dysfunctional and co-dependent relationship you will be amazed at what a healthy one feels like.
Take the time to get to know the person you want to marry. Get rid of false expectations and snap back to reality. If we get into a relationship expecting to be swept off our feet and live life happily ever after we are setting ourselves up for failure. Relationships take a lot of work and love is much more than a feeling it is an action; it requires putting other people before one's self and pleasing them and in order to please someone else you need to learn about them. What you like may not be what they like.
Nearly two thirds of people that divorce will get married for a second time. We all have the desire to be loved and to be in a loving relationship but we need to learn what that means and that revolves around knowing who we are, faults and all, and truly getting to know the person you want to spend your life with. Don't let the failures from the past keep you from achieving the relationship you long for. Keep a positive attitude and continue to work for the love you want and deserve.
Divorce doesn't mean you are destined to be alone. Christian life after divorce can be as good or bad as you wish. Learn how to improve the quality of your life and tips for remarriage after divorce.
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Source: Ezine